Unit 6: Meditation and Assessment

I almost hate to say this again, but I struggle with this week's loving-kindness exercise.  This is the exercise from Dacher (2006):

"Close your eyes and for a minute or two rest into the natural ease of your mind and body, and repeat the following phrases for 10 minutes:
May all individuals gain freedom from suffering.
May all individuals find sustained health, happiness, and wholeness.
May I assist all individuals in gaining freedom from suffering.
May I assist all individuals in finding health, happiness, and wholeness."

Ten minutes never seemed so long.  I actually found myself looking at my watch more often during this exercise than any previous.  I suppose I am impatient, or maybe I just need *a lot* more practice at this whole "quietness/stillness" thing.  This was harder for me than the weeks previous because there was no noise (no water soundtrack, no voices...just nothing).

The second part of our weekly exercise was a personal integral assessment.  Of all aspects, I chose my biological  aspect to focus on.  I am more critical of my physical appearance (and less satisfied with it) than any other aspect of my life.  Most of my personal struggles come from my dislike of my physical body (although I know that makes me sound shallow, I am not).  I chose this aspect because I know my life (in so many ways) would be so much easier/less complicated if I could just learn to love my physical body.  In an attempt to grow this part of me, I have placed positive affirmations relating to self-love all over my house (particularly by my computer, in my bedroom, and in the bathroom) where I spend the most time (other than work, of course).  Another thing I have done is purchase a full-length mirror for the first time in at least 15 years.  I make myself look at my body every single day, even if for only a few minutes.  I am hoping these two things, along with positive self talk, will help begin mending this area of my life.

Until next time...

Unit 5: The Subtle Mind

This week we were focused on the subtle mind.  Last week's exercise was more centered on others whereas this week we were not to focus on any one thing or person specifically.  We were to allow our thoughts to "drift" and to acknowledge but not cling to them.  This means that any random thought in our mind was "okay" and we were not attempting to have any particular thought.  This is the witnessing mind.

I will be honest, I was excited as the exercise began with a male voice.  Of course, I was quickly disappointed as the female took over for the remainder of the exercise.  I had difficulty letting my mind "drift" and not clinging to thoughts as they came to me.  I also had difficulty sitting still for the length of the exercise.  I noticed my leg starting to bounce/fidget about half-way through the exercise.  Then I found myself focused on the fact that my leg was bouncing (which means I was, in fact, clinging to that thought).  Overall it was a decent exercise, but definitely not my favorite to date.

Wellness is all-encompassing...spiritual, physical, and mental.  One cannot be truly "well" if one of those things is not "in tune."  I think of it like a three-legged stool.  If one leg is shorter (or longer) than the other two, it is not stable and cannot really be sat upon sturdily.  To develop wellness, one must consider (equally) all three aspects and strive to improve all of them.

Until next time...

Unit 4: Mental Workout

This week we focused on loving kindness exercises as a mental workout.  A mental workout can be thought of as the mental equivalent of a physical workout.  You cannot improve your physical health without effort and practice.  Your mental health is the same.  To reach deeper levels of consciousness and move closer to human flourishing you must practice (sustained effort).  Allotting time each day for a mental workout (our book mentions an hour a day) and making it a priority will be important to maintain the benefits long-term.  As with physical exercise...use it or lose it.

Our guided practice/mental workout for the week was not my favorite to date.  I have done the exercise four times so far this week (not the recommended twice daily, I know).  I think it is the woman's voice that makes me struggle with this exercise more.  The male voice I found more relaxing (although I also struggled with those exercises).  I will say; however, that I struggled less with this one for my previous reasons.  I just found myself continuously focused on her voice and kept thinking I would rather it be a man.  Overall, the purpose of the exercise was great, and I would recommend it to others.  I truly believe that more people should take the time to be less self-centered and focus more on others and their feelings.  This exercise would be a great first step to making that a reality.

Until next time,
-Erica

Unit 3: My Own Wellness {currently}

This week we are to evaluate ourselves in an effort to really identify our own strengths and weaknesses.  I

am excited to take such a detailed inventory of myself so that it gives me the opportunity to measure personal growth as I move forward through this journey.

My physical well-being: I would give myself an 8 out of 10 in this area.  I have worked extremely hard over the last two years to improve my physical health.  I have lost nearly 170 pounds and went from a 28W to a 12 in jeans.  I am more physically active today than I have ever been in my life and I love it.  There are areas of my physical health that are not optimal (which is why I did not give myself a full 10).  I do have arthritis in my knees and I do not eat 100% clean/organic.  My goal in this area is to improve the quality of food I am putting into my body consistently (that is the key...consistency) and to continue to workout regularly.

My spiritual well-being: This is a challenging area for me.  I am not religious, but I do consider myself spiritual.  I believe there is a higher connectedness in the universe and that all things come together to create the larger picture.  Additionally, I believe that what energy I put out is returned to me, which is why I strive to be positive in even the most challenging situations, and I always take time to see others' point of view.  The people closest to me would also tell you I am consistently kind, generous, helpful, compassionate, and genuinely supportive/encouraging.  So, I suppose I would give myself another 8 out of 10 in this area.  As for a goal...I am not quite sure.

My psychological well-being: I am going to give myself yet another 8 out of 10.  In March 2011 I sought the help of a therapist because my psychological well-being was in shambles.  In June of this year I was released from therapy after making such wonderful strides.  I cope better with stress today than I ever have.  I am mentally and emotionally more calm/at peace.  The biggest portion, though, is that I now am to the point where I can express emotion without allowing them to control me.  This is something I struggled with greatly before therapy and am thankful to have such a better handle on.  My goal in this area is to continue to utilize the tools taught to me by my therapist and grow into an even better version of myself than I am today.

Our relaxation exercise this week was "Rainbow Meditation."  This technique utilizes chakras and their associated colors (7 colors, 7 regions of the body).  We moved from the base of the spine (red) up through the top of the head (violet).  Each area of the body/spine correlated to a different color.  I found this exercise a little easier than last week's.  I still struggled to keep my mind clear and to really relax, but I do feel as though I did better than last week.  As we move forward through the weeks, I believe I will get better at clearing my mind and really relaxing.  I am looking forward to it!

Until next time,
-Erica